Three Inspirational Karens: Friendship and Life Lessons

Karen³

Karen cubed, is about the three #KindKarens, I knew. There is a lot of bad press for the Karen’s of the world. I must talk about the three Karen’s I had the pleasure of knowing.

I love the 1^st Karen I knew.  She was the office prankster, the practical joker. She was a friend who became an employee briefly and then became just a friend again. I have known her for over thirty years. I hope to know her thirty more.  She may have had a dated style. She wore a bouffant hairstyle and traditional old-school glasses. Her glasses eventually got attached to a chain around her neck.  She was tiny. Her personality was so big that everyone who met her adored her, after they got to know her. At least that was true for those interactions I had the pleasure of witnessing.  In high school she was a cheerleader and I think in everyday life she remained a cheerleader. Karen taught me to let go and have fun!

I first met her on a small adult volleyball league. That was thirty years ago. To this day, they still gather as a volleyball league. I am not sure there is much volleying or spiking or even a ball at their gatherings today.  She became one of my employees for 4 years and when I left and then she left, we remained friends.  I can always count on instantly connecting and talking rapidly for an hour straight with probably more laughter than words. We would reminisce about all the shenanigans she pulled at work.  I’ll just give you one example of her most outrageous stunts.  We had a male manager in a department that would often be cranky for no valid work reason. Karen put a box of tampons on her male co-worker’s desk. She added a note that just said, “It must be your time of month.” Now eventually we had drinks and laughed tirelessly with the gentlemen that she played pranks on. But that was just the way it was, Karen made friends with everyone. Today a prank like that would probably get you fired.

One other time I recall her being like one of the infamous snoop sisters of the sixties. We had an employee that was a functioning alcoholic. Karen desperately wanted to help her. To be sure she was an alcoholic, Karen visited her house. When this mutual friend left the room, Karen stuck her finger in what she portrayed as a glass of water. Karen then licked her finger. To no one’s real surprise, it was pure vodka. Although the overall picture was not funny, Karen could turn the story into one that gave continuous laughter!

Sometimes it is at a baby shower for a mutual acquaintance’s child or grandchild. It may also be at a wedding. I hate to say it, but even at an occasional funeral. Karen could tell a story and make you laugh until you cried.  Karen may be the one person to have taught me that there is always a silver lining. No matter, how dark, no matter how desperate.

Karen and I attended the same church for a bit. We had a parishioner who also happened to live on the same street as me.  She was a recently single mom raising five children.  Her middle child was tragically taken at the age of ten. It happened at the end of our street. She rolled her bicycle onto a busy highway. She either forgot to stop or just did not stop soon enough.  My house became a refuge for her two younger siblings during the following days. They could escape the grieving and simply be kids, just playing video games.  I think that may be the one time in life I could not see a silver lining. I did learn a valuable lesson from that incident though. We were all part of a prayer chain. As this child lay in hospital in ICU, we prayed daily. Then, when word came that she was improving, we stopped praying. Then she passed. I now take praying, or holding good thoughts, or meditating, one step beyond where it is needed.  It never hurts to send good vibes out into the universe to help those in need. I try and do it daily for those suffering in Ukraine or LA with the wildfires raging.  I admit, it does slip my mind from time to time and for that I do have regrets.  It only takes a minute or five a day, to let all good thoughts and prayers gather in your mind. I strive each day to make the time! Maybe it will help others to experience the silver linings in life from time to time!

As I think about the Karen’s I’ve known in my life, I feel for those Karen’s. They are being compared to the #KrazyKarens of today. I knew two other Karen’s that both also taught me lessons that I strongly value today. They both worked for me one twenty-five years ago. One Karen I will never forget as she brought Google to work one day. Google was in Beta test at one time at a major auto manufacturer where Karen’s husband worked. It was 1999 and that truly is the person who introduced me to Google.  My life only got easier from there. I embrace new technology and new tools that enhance and improve life. I knew Karen for only three years. Then, she moved off to another state. But Google is still with me today. Google, I interact with daily, Google may be my best friend! Thank you, Karen, wherever you are!

The other Karen I recall knowing dearly was who we referred to as “ten-minute Karen”. No matter how many days, no matter how many times warned, written-up, threatened, Karen was always ten-minutes late.  No excuse, no valid reason, no getting kids on to the bus, her kids were grown. But maybe she was among the first people I met with OCD or ADD. I was introduced to her without knowing the real struggles she had to overcome each morning.  Those disorders are certainly more talked about now in mainstream. But back then, it was just one of the many disorders that stayed in the dark. These disorders were not talked about. They were not acknowledged and maybe even kept in the closet. Or maybe today’s social media makes us all more aware. Now, we are more aware of the private sufferings of others. The silver lining of social media! Karen was a four-year acquaintance at best. She was lost to a business merger. She went off to teach another employer to be patient with those who just can not get there on time. If you know these types, they always want to make it up. They are willing to stay ten minutes after or even longer if needed. Please have patience with those that are struggling.

Appreciate all that you do not have to suffer through. Many people are experiencing these disorders. They need the rest of us to have patience!

The other take away from this blog post. We really should not discriminate. The name Karen has gotten such a bad wrap. It is not deserved by the Karen’s I knew and loved.